The night I wrote the things happening in my head

Can’t sleep.

I decided to just get up from bed and write things that I am currently thinking of. The first thought was about a serious talk between some of my friends at Kerygma Family. I usually attend the Kerygma Feast every Sunday and after the Feast members of the forum who meet and join the Feast eat in the Ortigas area. We were about 10 or something on that day but after lunch some left already due to some errands or appointments or commitments in the afternoon. I was left with Kaye, TJ, Lloyde, and Melhaira. After some strolling in the mall we decided to have coffee and I volunteered for the doughnut.

As usual discussions is about relationship and serious stuff for our age (we are mostly in our 20 something) and some of the complicated and intricate things about human relationships. Thoughts were thrown regarding when or how will one know if truly one says that a relationship is true or genuine and personal opinion regarding having relationship and the obstacles based on our personal experiences. On how we value a person and how we appreciate someone. I admire Melhai in her stories. She is younger than I am but she seems to be that person who has finally overcome the pain in life. She recounts how she was in the past being brat or spoiled until she learns how hard life is and found someone who loves her dearly and married her in spite of her condition. I miss her high pitch tone though it’s irritating. She just talks and talks(and we wonder if she is really sick with that lively mood she is always in) but when she remembers her life she talks seriously and starts to sound logical and give you a perspective of life that is kinda hard to believe. She cries silently while talking. Her tears just flow down her cheeks and then stops and try to put her self back by putting a smile. I miss her and I hope she recovers. We have been praying for her recovery.

We call him “bunso” and we are in awe to this young fellow. TJ is just 21(hope I’m right) and he is a professor in UP Los Banos teaching computer courses. I have never thought that this tech wiz kid knows much more of about religion than I do. He is analytical and he analyzes every arguments. He runs his blog and his topics runs from religion to everything. He has viewpoints you won’t imagine coming from an early age.

Kaye on the other hand is well my group age (hehehe) she is as old as I do and she is that kind of girl whom you can discuss things with. Sometimes serious and sometimes just I don’t know ;). I always picture her as the girl saying “anak ng tokwa” (son of tofu). At her age I know she has that self confidence to handle the pressures of life. Her doing a man’s job (she’s an architect) and taking up Masters kinda makes her different. One of the things we talked about on that day was being there for your family and one having your own family. She is not worried being alone at this age but what she pointed out was that at certain point we want to have someone to rest our tired and wearied life and just be comfortable with this someone. We talked about cars and how convenient it would be to have a van to accommodate a family to go there and here.

Lloyde was the regular guy….and Kaye would like to call him Manong due to you know….
He shared things that I can’t share here ;) but he has given me a perspective about his sharing….that sometimes things are just it and that no matter what we do it is what it is and no matter how much we wanted to untangle the complications of life it can’t be untangle. What we could do is to wait and see and hope that in the end all will be well…We have the power to chose but there are times in life that no matter how easy and great to choose one path we would rather grab the other……and live its miserable side effects……and the very reason is that it is already there and life is always been this complicated: it is the human nature to let it be. I always remember Lloyde with his gesture when the group part ways…he makes that nod with that funny look….man !!!

Right now I am wondering why I wrote these things. I hope I can meet this guys and the rest of the gang and have that talk we use to have….our topic ranges from the serious side of life to the complications and the funny side of it to the point of always not losing hope in God and that all can be made right and that He always provides us with what we truly need. I wish I can be there on a Sunday Feast in May….or maybe talk and hang out to the Makati group(that is what I saw in the forum that Makati based members see each other) on a Friday over a cup of my favorite cappuccino!!! I hope sis grace anne can be there for with us on that day: that she may have the time to fly from Cebu and just be there on a Friday over a coffee session. Talk about our fuzzy life and share and solve and discuss personal opinions.

Or maybe the overseas members like me are there on a Friday. Maybe Rowin in China, Allan and Kakay in Singapore, Bradz in New Zealand, Reina in Taiwan, Myonee in Dubai, and the rest of the guys in other parts of the world (what’s the name of that guy in the Scandinavia country?) to chat with the other guys there…it will be a grand EB all over again together with the newbies..

I am reminded of Tin who is soon working in NY, Tin C may kambal Julia, the sisteret Aya and Dianne, Mogy, the other guys like the Twins, Aileen, Ching( by the way how are you sis?), Rose, Au, Eric, Ms. July and her Eric, Stanzi, The Girl from Davao, Yumi ko, Cutieara, FTS, Bro Dacs the authority in Catholic dogma, the girl from Laguna(sis Reina what’s her name again?), and all of the guys and gals I have meet personally or through the magic of the web(like Glenda all the way from Middle east) and don’t forget our MJ sis Cha or charity or Jen….bf?(I don’t know why you and kaye cal each other bf)…

I think I have the wrong title for this one…..but nonetheless I need to sleep now because I have to do my Saturday ritual. I hope it doesn’t rain and that I can kick my self up so that I can add another block to may run-jog- walk habit. I think I need to gulp my milk to put me to sleep…its 11:30 now in Guam 9:30 in the Philippines and I don’t know for the rest of the world…Myonee I think its 4:30 in the afternoon there in your area and sis Reina its 9:30 there in Taiwan…because I just know because I know someone there ….

Really need that gulp….

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At what cost?

It was a funny experience. After eating dinner at Capricciosa we decided to look at the things sold in ABC store. ABC store is like the 7Eleven of Guam. You can see it almost everywhere. They sell most stuff for visiting tourist like souvenirs, clothes that tells about Guam, and many more.

As we were window showing I came across a shelf were carvings of the early settlers of Guam was show case. They are like the totem or lucky charms that we usually see in some souvenir shops in Baguio. What struck is the name written in the shelf about the carvings representation.

One was for Luck; the other was for Money, one for Strength (I am a bit bewildered why strength is represented by a woman like carving), Happiness, Peace, Longevity, and Love. Thoughts and ideas started to form in my mind. It has been a long time for me since I wrote my blog and a part of me starts kicking to write about this experience.

As I amuse myself about these carvings and while my mind is processing the ideas that came to my mind, I happen to look at the back of the carvings and saw the price for each 2-4 inch carvings: $5.00. Again my mind began to play and scoop out in me something. Then I finally have some concept. How we wish the representations of these carvings can be bought at $5.00.

For the so many longings that we experience I could have bought Love. For my daily dire needs I could have bought Money, for my troubled mind Peace, for the everyday boredom Happiness, and for the enjoying of my fleeting years Longevity. Why is it life is not like that? It could have been so comforting that all the things can be bought in a store (like the ABC store or maybe in a mall like SM). Probably it would be the best commodity to sell and anyone who will be in this business of selling these emotions will be rich in no time. If only Peace could be that affordable I could have bought one for the world.

Sometimes life is so funny that we work hard all our lives and yet end up to nothing. As Brad Pitt said in his movie Meet Joe Black there are only two things certain in this world….Death and Taxes. Tax time is near and I know everyone is all scampering to prepare there tax and doing there best to make their payable tax small. We wanted income and actually we badly needed it to defray our daily needs but on this time of the year we wanted that we never earn that much so that we wouldn’t hand our hard earned money to the Government. We see it as problem seeing that we earn that much.

At what cost are we willing to buy our internal needs? At what means do we do our best to reduce our tax payable? Life goes on and definitely death is certain and tax as well.

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A trip to Yap

I came to Yap yesterday, February 20, and it brought me back to my younger days spending time in the province. I told my companion that the place looks like a “barangay”. The place was quiet. Being just right in the middle of the Pacific with remote access makes it kind the backward place; away from civilization.

Yap is called the Stone Money state. It is part of Federated State of Micronesia. The stone money that they use is carved in Palau. It makes me think how the Yapese made to bring the stone money to Palau and back to Yap. Just seeing the size of the stone money will surely amaze you. I was asking some locals regarding why the Yapese has to use such heavy money and they have all the trouble bring the stone to Palau to carve it and then bring it back instead of using lighter and simpler things as money. Probably because the island has not that much metal thus they use stones. The local says that there is no direct explanation why their ancestors have to go to Palau in order to have that money carve. What they know is that the value of the stone is greater when the size is bigger and that the number of persons who passed away carving it. Probable the reason why Yapese has to go all through the trouble to have a value attached to their money basing it on the length of time and effort exerted just to make the stone money.

It is humbling experience to be in Yap. Life is not hassle. There is no rush. They are simple people with simple life. People here just wear simple clothing in their workplace. Most are in their slippers….even if they work for an office not like ours where we need to wear business suit or uniform. Vehicles are either left or right handed but mostly right handed because most are Japan surplus. With the soaring price of gas most are relying on the public bus for their transportation.

Most chew a nut mixed with lime and a particular leaf. If you don’t know their culture you might get shock because you might think there is blood in their mouth. This is their “cigarette”. Almost every adult has this particular chew weather male or female. Much like a cigarette they chew it on their breaks, after a meal, and some even while working. I have no offense against it since it’s their culture and practice. It is something which a visitor like me must respect.

They are a jolly and a hospitable people. Their island is separated from most access thus supply here is scarce. You might end up eating the same meal in any restaurant if the shipment from neighboring islands is not coming or broken. You can’t demand for a food which is not available so one must content itself to what the island can offer. Thus for me its humbling because living in Manila and right now in Guam where you can have the things you want just across any store and them living that kind of life in an island so peaceful and quiet makes one value things that we mostly complain in our own place. The principle “to appreciate what one has rather than to grumble on the wants that one has not” is truly the meaning of appreciation.

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