Emotions

I had a chat with a friend our topic revolved around emotion. I have been on the side that our emotions should be accepted because these things are the reflections of what is deep inside us.

I googled emotion and I had this chart from Wikipedia.

Primary emotion	Secondary emotion	Tertiary emotions
Love	Affection	Adoration, affection, love, fondness, liking, attraction, caring, tenderness, compassion, sentimentality
	Lust	Arousal, desire, lust, passion, infatuation
	Longing	Longing
Joy	Cheerfulness	Amusement, bliss, cheerfulness, gaiety, glee, jolliness, joviality, joy, delight, enjoyment, gladness, happiness, jubilation, elation, satisfaction, ecstasy, euphoria
	Zest	Enthusiasm, zeal, zest, excitement, thrill, exhilaration
	Contentment	Contentment, pleasure
	Pride	Pride, triumph
	Optimism	Eagerness, hope, optimism
	Enthrallment	Enthrallment, rapture
	Relief	Relief
Surprise	Surprise	Amazement, surprise, astonishment
Anger	Irritation	Aggravation, irritation, agitation, annoyance, grouchiness, grumpiness
	Exasperation	Exasperation, frustration
	Rage	Anger, rage, outrage, fury, wrath, hostility, ferocity, bitterness, hate, loathing, scorn, spite, vengefulness, dislike, resentment
	Disgust	Disgust, revulsion, contempt
	Envy	Envy, jealousy
	Torment	Torment
Sadness	Suffering	Agony, suffering, hurt, anguish
	Sadness	Depression, despair, hopelessness, gloom, glumness, sadness, unhappiness, grief, sorrow, woe, misery, melancholy
	Disappointment	Dismay, disappointment, displeasure
	Shame	Guilt, shame, regret, remorse
	Neglect	Alienation, isolation, neglect, loneliness, rejection, homesickness, defeat, dejection, insecurity, embarrassment, humiliation, insult
	Sympathy	Pity, sympathy
Fear	Horror	Alarm, shock, fear, fright, horror, terror, panic, hysteria, mortification
	Nervousness	Anxiety, nervousness, tenseness, uneasiness, apprehension, worry, distress, dread

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Falling in Love again

Yes its the sweetest thing in the world. Getting engaged to someone you love. But before all that happens the two of you should fall in love again. I broke up with my first girlfriend about two years ago. It was hard. After being together for so long, about 3 years, I just said "its enough, I cant stand it". Relationship at first are good. You cant wait for the time that you can call or see her. Weekends for me are always a date with her. And as relationship progresses each of you begin to trust each other allowing things to happen between you. It happen to us and as normal couples we are always sweet. She clinging her hand around my hand and mine to hers. But it all faded because of so many factors. We begin to argue on important things until the time that even small things become big deal. She breaks with me and then calls me and me being so in love to her would just be there for her. But time will always come when a man has to throw the towel. After all the sacrifices and all the best I could do to save what we have I gave up. I begin to count the times she broke up to me and I begin to measure things if she truly love me she wont have done this and that....I begin to point out things that I never like....and as we all know thing begin to sour....she calling me to come back because she cant take the pain of me breaking up with her. I have to because I believe it is the best for us. If we keep on doing the things we do we might end up regretting in the future if we do get married.

That is why when I attended a wedding I formed a thought that people who get married are crazy. Two sided crazy perspective. One side of my thought says that people get married to a person who they think was and then in the end will realize it wasn't the person they wish for. After the super grand wedding and the super romantic reception and the sweet time of honeymoon they will end up sharing a bed. The man begins to snore every night and the woman begins to nag and tells her husband the things that happens in the office which the husband doesn't really care about. Then the morning quarrels begin and then the late not coming home husband thing will follow. Until the time that each of them would have wish that one will die soon and the butt of jokes will be that they will be a happy widow or widower.

Crazy because after spending sometime they begin to hate each other and yet they don't have a way to part ways because they are already married or if you live in a country were there is divorce, they can part ways but with some excess baggage like dividing properties, child custody and the like. Crazy people do get married.

On the other hand yes people who get married are crazy in a sense that it is self-sacrificing. Yes they get married because they both are head over heels to each other. They spend the honeymoon as if they don't care to the world as long as they are together. Love blossoms in the house. The man always kiss his wife when he goes out of their house and upon entering their house from work. Occasional and passionate love making, and the responsibilities of each in doing their share in household chores. But time will come that these sweet things in marriage won't be satisfied.

The husband starts to be late(sometimes we don't know why is he late again if its work or something else), the wife nags because she is envious of the neighbors who just bought a new car, and the usual stuff. But the crazy thing is that when each one starts to listen and lower oneself. Just letting the other say this and that just to make the marriage intact. Sometimes the wife knew already of his husband's so called "left turn" or the wife's constant belittling of her husband. Sometimes they are martyr. Just letting things go and if you ask them why they would just say "because I love him/her".

But there are truly crazy people who get married. And those are the ones who accepts the person for what he or she is and help there partner to be not the person that they wanted but rather to be the best person that he or she can be. A self sacrifice of caring and understanding. They say that true love is not when a person's heart starts to throb in a weird manner, it actually starts when one accepts the defects of the person whom they love and help her be the best person that they can be. Crazy because they chose to have the hardships of getting hurt rather than choosing to just be happy on their own merry ways.

As if you are falling in love again. You fall in love not because of the beauty and the handsomeness of the person. Not because of the sweetness and the romance, and the vigor the other can offer but rather you fall in love because you wanted to not because your body urges you.That is a different kind of craziness.

I begin to write this because I myself has begun to fall in love again but to the level of the one just I described. I knew this girl back in college and I noticed her already but just recently I just cant stop myself. It was a crazy thing to do to tell her what I feel specially now that we are miles apart. I know it would made her bewildered why I am doing such things. But thats how love works. It made my heart throb in a weird way that I just cant stop myself wanting to talk to her and tell her about it but when I am on the phone I just cant say it. So I told her that I will just tell it to her in an email to explain why I am acting weird.

I did. Yet I didn't get the answer i wanted but she didn't close the door for me. Love drives people crazy. And crazy that it may seems I think I am acting just like the crazy people I have just mentioned. In case my endeavors with this girl prospers I know you would remind me about my words because one day I will be crazy asking a girl or maybe this girl to be with me and get married.

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At what cost?

It was a funny experience. After eating dinner at Capricciosa we decided to look at the things sold in ABC store. ABC store is like the 7Eleven of Guam. You can see it almost everywhere. They sell most stuff for visiting tourist like souvenirs, clothes that tells about Guam, and many more.

As we were window showing I came across a shelf were carvings of the early settlers of Guam was show case. They are like the totem or lucky charms that we usually see in some souvenir shops in Baguio. What struck is the name written in the shelf about the carvings representation.

One was for Luck; the other was for Money, one for Strength (I am a bit bewildered why strength is represented by a woman like carving), Happiness, Peace, Longevity, and Love. Thoughts and ideas started to form in my mind. It has been a long time for me since I wrote my blog and a part of me starts kicking to write about this experience.

As I amuse myself about these carvings and while my mind is processing the ideas that came to my mind, I happen to look at the back of the carvings and saw the price for each 2-4 inch carvings: $5.00. Again my mind began to play and scoop out in me something. Then I finally have some concept. How we wish the representations of these carvings can be bought at $5.00.

For the so many longings that we experience I could have bought Love. For my daily dire needs I could have bought Money, for my troubled mind Peace, for the everyday boredom Happiness, and for the enjoying of my fleeting years Longevity. Why is it life is not like that? It could have been so comforting that all the things can be bought in a store (like the ABC store or maybe in a mall like SM). Probably it would be the best commodity to sell and anyone who will be in this business of selling these emotions will be rich in no time. If only Peace could be that affordable I could have bought one for the world.

Sometimes life is so funny that we work hard all our lives and yet end up to nothing. As Brad Pitt said in his movie Meet Joe Black there are only two things certain in this world….Death and Taxes. Tax time is near and I know everyone is all scampering to prepare there tax and doing there best to make their payable tax small. We wanted income and actually we badly needed it to defray our daily needs but on this time of the year we wanted that we never earn that much so that we wouldn’t hand our hard earned money to the Government. We see it as problem seeing that we earn that much.

At what cost are we willing to buy our internal needs? At what means do we do our best to reduce our tax payable? Life goes on and definitely death is certain and tax as well.

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A Woman's Embrace

What does a woman's embrace do to a man?

An action so powerful yet so devastating.

As a mother, a woman embrace her child to give her warmth and nourishment. The very essential things a young person needs to survive the harsh environment.

As a friend; a woman's embrace brings comfort to another female friend who broke up with her boyfriend, to a male friend it brings shield to the depression of being not accepted.As a friend, an embrace of joy of a victory and a embrace of empathy of a lost.

As lover, it gives pleasure to the senses. The soft body of a woman envelops a mans hard body;complementing human desires and urges. The supple body of a human arouses a man's inner desire that leads to what some call love or others call it passion.

To a husband it is a reassurance of trust. A support for a man's failure.

An embrace to a mistress; is a ticking time bomb. Time will tell and all will be revealed and all will be in chaos.It brings division;it brings separation.It leads to a broken family.Creates distrust and disarrayed children.

From a prostitute cause attachment. A man comes back for it because he cant find it at home. He's body longs for it....something different....something exciting...that leads to separation.

A woman's embrace is so powerful...thus all should value it. It could give comfort at the same time it could create division.

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Matrix v.02

I have written about the Matrix back then…lately I was able to watch the third installment and finally I was able to get the idea of the story.

The part I like the most was when Neo was trap in the train station in the Matrix. There he met Satte and her parents, the program that operates the generator and the creative program that keeps the beautiful things they see inside the Matrix. The discussion between Neo and the program that runs the power source was the one that really caught my attention. There one puts meaning to every word we say. Saying I love you is purely an action of blurting out the words. All we see are letters arranged to convey a message. But beyond that the meaning that we put depends on the relationship these words establish.

A relationship is established by giving attention and value to someone or something. A connection must be established. Thus a relationship is created in due time….not just in a snap of a finger. It is build through time. We as humans have a normal ability to interact thus it seems so easy for us to establish a connection but what if one day we wake up in a reality where we are actually under a Matrix. Our actions are limited by the programs that run the Matrix environment and probably will hinder us from establishing relationship. Just like an anti-virus program we might be quarantine and deleted to protect the system.

So how will we establish relationship in a world where there are programs to follow? Should we be ourselves and go all out or should we be choosy on to whom we should trust? Your happiness depends on your hand my friend, no matter how hard will be the consequences you must chose weather to establish a relationship or not. Just like the text message I got: The bravest thing to do? – To Love…

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Touch

Touch 

We do it everyday. Each passing moment of our lives we touch our special someone. It comes in so many forms. A hug gives our love to that special someone. A pat or tap at one’s shoulder expressing our appreciation. A handshake to express acknowledgement of a person’s accomplishments. A kiss in the check to express our friendliness. A wink to express our inner expression. So many forms of touch, so many lives change by that simple act.

In my life many people have made a difference by way of a touch. My former classmates at the seminary always clasp each others arms or a tap at the back. It brings back the old days in the walls of our alma mater. Friends always make that particular wave at you and you already know what it means. It puts a smile in my face every time I reminisce those moments.


Why does such act put a good feeling in our skins, in our hearts and soul? Maybe it is that act that tells our bodies that we need not worry because someone is there who cares. They say that a new born child who has not completed the nine months it needs to fully form can be relieve in a simply massage, a simple touch that will tell the baby’s body to continue the process of building and construction of its essential parts.

Just like a potter, our lives are molded by the touch of every person that has gone through our life. And thus each hand that reaches us can either make us or destroy us. Our parents were the first human person that molded us into the person that we are. Then our siblings, our first friends in life. Come our friends in the neighborhood and school. Then our officemates and co-workers, our business partners. Then our special someone, our partner for life comes into our lives. Then we have our children and our grand children…..

In all the times of our life we always feel the touch of our Creator. From conception to our death, He has always been there. And because of that He has left an imprint in us to do the same, to touch each others lives. Making a difference in someone’s day. Bringing hope to a frustrated person, putting a smile in someone’s face, and uplifting someone bringing them closer to our Creator.

Touch one another. Make a difference in someone else life. Bring God to each and everyone.

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